A Very British Affair

This weeks vacation back in the UK was a lot of good despite Gloucestershire losing its water supply. I really hope if gets restored soon, as just my short stay there proved to be uncomfortable – particularly as my parents had a number of my auntie's visiting. It was excellent to see them again and one of them I had not seen in over twenty years – I plan to go and see them again all next year.

My main reason for heading back to the UK, was a very old and dear friend of mine was getting married. All weddings are unique in their own way, the one I attended this weekend was without doubt the poshest wedding I have been to.

I got a feeling it was going to be something special when on the invite:

Dress Code:

Armed Forces
Please wear number one uniforms with medals and swords.

Civilian
Boys in black tie and ladies in evening dresses

The venue was nothing less than spectacular. The pre-drinks took place in the Royal Fusilier museum and the ceremony took place in the Royal Fusiliers Chapel. Both of these are situated in the Tower of London – my favorite tourist attraction in London and home of the Crown Jewels.

Having a wedding ceremony in such a historic building brings a real sense of occasion and also one of huge curiosity from the masses of tourists enjoying a fine British summer afternoon. The groom as a serving Royal Fusilier was simply able to request the use of the museum and chapel as this there HQ – it all seemed amazingly simple.

The military theme of the wedding and day was prevalent and made for a very formal occasion. Mr Campion who was lucky enough to be an usher (seen below in the kilt)



Commented that in the 'briefing' prior to the wedding for the ushers was done with military precision. It went something like this:

“At 15.45 hours please take your pre-assigned positions and guide the guests to the Chapel. At 16.00 hours we will all collapse to the Chapel for final preparations”

Mr Campion's response (other than “Sir, Yes Sir) was “Collapse at 16.00 hours? I haven't even had anything to drink yet!”

The wedding ceremony was performed by the battalion reverend who at the age of 85 was retiring that day. Suffice to say he was quite a character and I have never heard a sermon before where he described a story where he was told to “F Off”. Larger than life would not even come close to describing him.

The guests who came in full military number outfits provide the guard of honor outside the church for the guests and happy couple to walk through. It certainly was an impressive site:


It also caught a lot of attention from tourists who joined in the round of applause once they “fell out”

After the ceremony we traveled to the TA base of the Royal Artillery. Which was perhaps the most surprising aspect of the day. I walked through the main gate not really sure what to expect – I was then greeted by a very lush looking cricket field accented by the Royal Artillery's freshly polished cannons:



The reception was held in a magnificent oak panelled drawing room with huge portraits of British Monarchs including Queen Elizabeth II. Despite the surroundings the reception was incredibly fun with heartfelt speeches and a lot dancing to the very good live band.

Seeing Maria and James take their first dance and watching the delight they were having summed it all up for me.


I wish you all the very best in your new wedded life together.

Shifting and Fixing

A couple of weeks ago my time as a Dubai Marina resident came to an end as my lease expired and it was time to the move into Casa Jumeriah. Packing up and moving house is something that has to be at the top of my “least favorite activities”. I think it has something to do with this amount I had to do as a student, where moving all your gear out at the end of each term was standard.

However Dubai has man power a plenty the pain of this can be eased considerably. A lot of my friends swear by the services of the chaps who hang out in Kuwait Street and for as little has 250AED they can “shift” virtually any amount of possessions.

As I needed to put a lot of my furniture into storage but still have things for moving to Casa Jumeriah this led to a rather more challenging “shift” than usual and required the labelling of everything to either “local” or “storage”. I ended using a recommended firm called Total Moving Solutions (TMS), the chaps from TMS managed to do two things

1.Turn up in force (there was eight of them)
2.Work like demons for 12 hours

Here they are packing the lounge:


And they certainly had no shortage of packaging materials:

Still I managed to end up with ten boxes too many boxes at the villa and for some inexplicable reason I have ever pair of shoes with me other than my favorite snake skin ones. I guess I will have to live without them for the next six months.

The whole day was quite fascinating. The team of movers had a very obvious foreman who directed the other guys with a healthy does of assertiveness and certainly had the best command of the English language. Later that day Ganesh (the sales guy) came over to see how everything was going and issued a few commands of his own to the foreman which were then relayed to the rest of the guys doing the packing. I caught a glimpse of a very interesting hierarchy that I was hither to never exposed. Though this all seemed to disappear when I found all of them sat in one of the empty bedroom floors enjoying a very delicious smelling lunch of curry and chapatis. I would like to extend a big thanks to TMS for making the whole process easy.

Moving into Jumeriah has all ready shown me a different much more residential and dare I say “homely” side of Dubai. In six months when my apartment in Dubai Marina is complete I will have a tough choice to make. In the meantime I will enjoy living with my friends.

A Bridge of Troubled Waters

On my vacation back to the UK this week, I arrived on the day of some really bad flooding. (Snow, Terrorism, Flooding - respectively on each my last visits to the UK I am wondering if I should stay in Dubai more)

The following day I was helping a friend rescue her sodden possession's from a ground floor apartment that had received three foot of water over night and mysteriously had all gone the following morning. It had certainly left its mark though and the fridge, bed and sofa had all floated and ended up in different places. The fridge was blocking the kitchen door and had to be "kicked in" to gain access.

It was heart breaking for me to see a good friends worldly belongings become ruined. When she opened up a small jewellery box to see her favourite necklace not there and only half a pint of dirty dank water emptying out, it was really a sorrowful sight.

Still everyone rallied around and have provided her a place to stay while the repairs happen and storage for most of her things. I left feeling a sad but heartened by the community spirit and great circle of friends I have who all pitched in to help.

The following day I spent a glorious afternoon and evening in my old stomping ground of Putney. At night the Putney Bridge over the Thames is really a nice sight and typifies London for me:



It is odd to think that this water looking so serene one night was causing so much destruction such a short time before.

So Salik Can Stay...

Salik is the new road toll that was introduced at the start of July as has been the topic of numerous posts from the UAE blogger community. As well as being a popular topic of conversations in the pub or over dinner. I have resisted the urge to comment so far while I continue to patiently wait for the PIN to my Salik account to arrive via SMS to me.

However, something did make me smile about Salik. While listening to my favourite Dubai talk radio station - 103.8m Eye on Dubai, they have a little segway which goes something like this:

Question:
"Where are you suppose to put your Salik sticker on your bike?"
Answer:
"On your helmet"

While photographic evidence would suggest the contrary and a nice Salik sticker obscuring a good proportion of the windshield would appear to be the solution:




I trust should other Emirates choose to implement their own road toll systems that they all use the same sticker - otherwise the only view out of the windscreen we will have will be very small indeed.

EDIT: As if by magic this morning I received an SMS from Salik informing me my balance was below 30AED - this was excellent. A quick phone call to the call center had me furnished with a PIN. Now if only their online re-charge was working I would be in Salik bliss.

Land of the Brave

It has been a hectic time of the last couple of weeks which sadly has impacted my blogging time. But now normal service has been resumed.

At the start of July I took a trip to Scotland for our Annual sales kick off event. I really enjoy visiting Scotland and the highlight of the week for me was a visit to the wonderful steak restaurant at the Champany Inn situated in Linlithgow. Last time I went (some years ago) I ordered a rather immense Porterhouse that was still on fire when it arrived, however this time I went for a rib-eye and it was a much more manageable size and just as tasty to boot. The restaurant while small, has a real sense of occasion with wood paneled walls and Scottish hunting artifacts hung around the place. I like walking in and looking at the live lobster and oyster pool and on our arrivals the steaks were being rested:




A few years ago I went on a Stag weekend to Edinburgh and I vaguely recall having a fantastic night out in a pub called the "Three Sisters" I went back to reminisce:



This time it was a much more sedate affair, I left the twenty rugby boys and fancy dress at home. We had an enjoyable evening in Edinburgh and I certainly enjoyed all the new (to me) bars in George Street particular Tiger Lilly where there super cool atmosphere made a great accompaniment to delicious Mojito's.

The return to Dubai via Glasgow airport was hectic through the all the holidaymakers and the Emirates flight was totally packed. As a gold skywards member I was impressed that they had a list of us and we were treated especially well and we even got upgraded. With the number of families with young children I thought the escape to the haven of the Business class cabin would be bliss. I could not be more wrong.

As I sat their enjoying the latest podcast from David Pogue I could hear a very distinct high pitched wailing from a young child which continued for the whole flight. Now I do not really mind this but me and my fellow business cabin travelers had a few other things to contend with. Two hours into the flight a passenger collapsed in the cabin. The Emirates staff to their credit, were excellent in their response got him the medical attention he needed (he was smiling and joking by the time we landed) and even located a doctor on board to check him out.

While this was happening and the cabin crew were dashing around ,the chaps in the seat in front of us decided to recline. However a strange clicking sound indicated the in-seat motor had broken and the chair back nearly ended up on my seat-mate's legs:




The staff were unable to fix it, so the passenger who had reclined ended up in the rather unusual position of being full reclined for landing - probably not the best thing to have happened.

At the end of this week I will be boarding another Emirates flight back to the UK for a small vacation. I hope to have a much more restful flight this time - even in economy.

Must Be Something Inside

I am not usually one for car stickers - but I saw one yesterday in the car park in Dubai that really made me smile. One word I did not put into my Bluffer's Guide to Tagalog was the word "Pogi" meaning handsome:



This little Chevvy had numerous "pimping upgrades" but this was by far and away the best.

Aftermath

It is strange to think that of all the places I need to travel to for my job that encompasses over 98 countries the first time I have ever encountered any form of terrorism should be when I go back to the UK. I was enjoying a quiet Saturday evening in Dubai when on Sky News broke the story of the incident at Glasgow airport. So it was with a little trepidation that I flew into Glasgow airport this morning - I had no real reason to be worried. The security at the airport was very tight with a very high police profile.

The damage to the terminal was evident to see and the smell of the acrid smoke that I saw on Sky News still hung thick in the air. Here is the scene some 36 hours later:



The airport was very busy with reduced number of check in terminals, a very odd zig-zag walkway to get into and out of the airport and of course the slip roads to the front of the airport were closed. As ever the great British public simply soldiered on and I have great admiration for the service staff at the airport placating a large number of tourists.

I will be back in the UK later this month - I hope that the security level is reduced from the critical level it is currently set to.

Cold and Crisp

I have had another busy and productive week in South Africa. I like coming to Johannesburg at this time of year as the winter weather here makes a pleasant diversion from the stifling summer weather which has arrived early in Dubai this year.

What I like about Johannesburg weather at this time of year is that the mornings are crisp and clear with a gradual warm up in the day inviting afternoon al fresco dining.

This morning when I woke up and looked out of the window of the hotel I am currently staying at, I was treated to a rather dramatic scene:



Seeing such beautiful weather I can not help but think of the victims of the weather that is the polar opposite, such as the cyclone that recently hit Oman and is causing so much destruction in Karachi - my thoughts are with the victims and their families.

Weekend Tourist

One of the upsides of residing in Dubai is that I have been blessed by numerous visits from my friends and family. So far it is averaging one visit a month since I got here a year ago. I enjoy having visitors and have managed to establish a "must do list" that comfortably fills a week. This week I had my young cousin with his friend visit me in the first leg on a three month around the world trip.

As young lads their lists of wants was a little different from folk my age - they wanted to do all the normal things (Wild Wadi, Desert Safari, Souks etc) but with liberal sprinklings of pubs, clubs and general nightlife.

Wednesday night I took them for some quiet drinks in the Medinat and they were really impressed by the resident jazz band at JamBase. This was followed by some late night people spotting at Bar 44 and Buddah Bar.

The smooth crooning and relaxing tunes was really memorable for them - I find it one of my favorite Dubai night spots. It reminds me of a little piece of New York here in Dubai:



The following night, the start of the weekend, they joined me and my colleagues for some lively post-work drinks. Later that night, I made my way and home and they made it to the Peppermint Lounge, but were looking suitably strung out by then:



Then on the Friday night to make it a hat trick of nights out on the tiles - I was dragged along to "deep" at the aptly named Trilogy to witness Benny Banassi play to a very excited crowd. This was my first ever visit and I was impressed by the energy in the club but slightly less impressed at how packed it was:



On the Saturday, to relax, I took them to the Al Jazira beach club to do some water sports and take in some 45c sunshine. I have really grown to like the Al Jazira - despite not arriving till 1pm we easily found sun beds and the whole place is laid back and easy going.

There are now some fun water inflatables including an iceberg to climb, trampolines to bounce on and even a huge water based see-saw. This provided some hilarious moments:



Later in the day Duncan, took my cousin and his friend wake-boarding for their first time. They found it tough and both vowed to give it another try. Duncan made it look easy doing it one handed and impressing us by getting some nice "air" and generally looking like a pro:



I have had to cut the weekend short and head down to South Africa for the relative sedate life of back to back customer meetings all week.

My cousin and his friend will spend the rest of the week going on a desert safari, going to wild wadi and taking a trip to Dubai's various souks and the creek. I am sure it will be interspersed with visits to Zinc, Rock Bottoms and Barasti before they leave Dubai for Thailand. Who ever said youth was wasted on the young?

Say that again?

It is easy in Dubai to take things for granted. However, over the last 36 hours I have just been amazed at a few ordinary everyday things:

1. Someone is willing to spend 11 million AED ($3m) on a number plate
2. My landlord wants to put the rent up 46% to any tenant willing to lease the apartment I will move out of shortly, 130k AED ($35k) last year to an amazing 190k AED ($51k) this year
3. After a fun, but messy, party at said apartment. I can lie in bed while my maid service turns up within one hour and within three hours you would never have known a party had ever happened and all for 75 AED ($20)
4. While lying in bed - a short phone call will get the cafe French Connection to deliver me a continental breakfast for 25 AED ($7)
5. In 42C temperature and humidity well over 80% - I can have my vehicle washed, vacuumed and detailed by five chaps for 20 AED ($5)

However, seeing your Dubai friends having a great time at a party you have just thrown:



Priceless.

Spicy Cheese with an American Pudding

As a Dubai Marina resident I tend to find myself going no further down the SZR than the Mall of the Emirates so when I was asked to go into deepest Deira I thought it best to bring a packed lunch and my iPod for the journey.

One of the original founding fathers of the famous all you can eat and drink Dubai buffet is Spice Island, situated in Renaissance Hotel in Deira. On my visit last Friday evening it was as popular as ever with long trestle like tables hosting several large birthday gatherings. For this type of celebration it is an excellent choice of venue. For a paltry 189AED you get access to a wide variety of buffet food, including six “live cooking stations” as well as a very generous selection of beverages. I was surprised to see the very tasty Asahi japense lager and even the mighty Conquistador Tequila included in their drink selection. It hardly seemed worth going for the “premium” package for 239AED just to drink Corona and Jose Cuervo instead.

The meal was fun and social – with numerous musical chairs going on as we got to talk and eat with most of the large group who attended. It also seemed that everyone was in the restaurant was doing this as well leading to a fairly boisterous environment – probably not the ideal venue for a more intimate rendezvous.

Once we were fed and watered we thought we had better work some of it off by visiting a packed and very hot night club. So we took the short cab ride over to the “The Lodge” for their seventies cheese night. Again this was my first visit to The Lodge. I was greeted by a very busy nightclub complete with very big bouncers. The place was busy with mostly western Expats dancing like extras from a seventies re-run of Top of the Pops to some very cheezy music. After a lot to drink it was fun and other than the sweltering heat I would have sworn I was in a London nightclub.

Here I am doing my best Boogie Nights dance:


The one effect of a very hot and busy nightclub was a very slippery dance floor. It made for some interesting dance moves but when intoxicated was also rather treacherous. Leading to a friend of mine preforming an unintended John Travlota hand jive to a back spin in one fell swoop. Needless to say this looked very painful and led to immediate swelling and blackening of her wrist.

Following this – we thought it might be best to get the wrist checked out to ensure there was no fracture or break. I was volunteered to chaperone my injured friend to the nearest hospital. This turned out to be a very short 4AED cab ride away – I felt sorry for the poor driver who had been waiting for a long time in the snaking taxi queue. I made sure to leave him a generous tip.

On entry to the Emergency Room at the American hospital we were quickly greeted by a porter with a wheel chair for my friend. Following a quick registration form and medical history we were whisked straight away to see a very friendly Doctor who after a short consultation sent my friend for an x-ray. This took place almost immediately in one of the many state of the art treatment rooms. The whole upshot was no fracture, a wrist support, some paracetamol and a bill for 800AED.



We were told that usually on a Friday night there would be a two to four hour wait – this Friday we were the only visitors. The Doctor claimed that people wanted to stay in their houses due to the recent cyclone Gonu that had recently swept across parts of the UAE and Oman. In all it was a very pleasant experience compared to the UK, where I have on more than one occasion spent a weekend evening in the company of swathes of injured and drunken people in the Accident and Emergency rooms across Britain.

Certainly not my most usual evening out in Dubai – but still memorable nonetheless.

Birthday

I have just noticed that two days ago - marked the first Anniversary of "An Englishman in Dubai". It has gone so fast I can barely believe it. If I look back this blog is certainly the longest I have ever kept any sort of diary and has now attracted over sixteen thousand visits and I have posted 157 articles, thanks to all the readers and those of you who have left kind comments. I would never have thought this possible a year ago.

I look forward to another year of blogging and here are my top ten moments of the year in relation to this blog:

1. Appearing on Eye on Dubai radio to talk about blogging
2. Being published in Gulf News
3. Making numerous new friends through this blog
4. Being able to blog about countries I had visited for the first time including - KSA, Egypt, Qatar, Russia , South Africa, Italy, Hungary and Oman
5. Being recommended by the highly regarded Grapeshisha guide to blogging in the UAE
6. Contributing to the UAE Community Blog
7. Getting a 4/5 star rating on the Guardian Abroad website
8. Being able to immortalise some special moments - like Nthabeleng singing in Dresden and buying my flat in Dubai
9. Blogging about appearing in Stuff and Wheels magazines
10. Being able to share some fun photos - my favourite being of Dubai Marina in the post Light Fantastic

I wonder what the next 12 months hold? Only time will tell.

XV

International rugby weekends hold a special attraction for me. It is one of the few things I have missed over the last 12 months since having moved to Dubai. Basically the regime is a week long and includes:

1. Reading the internet news feeds on both teams preparation's
2. Watching the pundits on the TV review the teams chances
3. Talking to my colleagues about how the match will go

And on the morning of the game:

1. Enjoying the broadsheet analysis of the match
2. Typically whilst enjoying a "Full English Breakfast" essential in preparing for the drinking marathon ahead
3. Donning the team colours and meeting up with old friends to enjoy a couple of pre-match refreshments

The walk into the ground is great - with a noticeable palpation of excitement from the crowd, then the first glimpse of the lush green field when you first take your seat. The anticipation as the teams run out and the anthems sung. This for me is always the best part - the build up. The excitement. The crowd. The noise. The smells. The atmosphere. The match in some ways is incidental to a fantastic day out with your friends.

Last weekend I was able to experience this exact thing - only this time I was at Loftus Versfeld Stadium in Pretoria, South Africa. I was in the fortunate position of being invited to a business partners box for the second test match between South Africa and England.

The match was a foregone conclusion. Though England put up a strong defence for the first fifty minutes holding them 22-22 and even going into half-time with a slight lead. This had the huge partisan crowd slightly on edge




The wheels on the chariot soon came off 30 minutes later - as I witnessed an unanswered try deluge from South Africa. To leave the hapless England team fatigued, bruised and defeated by an impressive 33 points:



Results aside - England have a lot to do in three short months prior to the world cup. Sure, they had 30 players left in England, sure there was a stomach virus in the squad. Nevertheless they were battered twice in two weeks - comprehensively. South Africa can consider it job done and will look forward to refining their plans through the Tri-Nations.

Me on the other hand - I wore my England shirt with pride. Much to the dismay of numerous South African supporters, Loftus is a pretty hostile place in this respect. I admired their team loyalty as many of them Brai'd hard before the match and the smell of lamb chops hung heavy before and after the match.

It was an excellent day - and my first chance to see live Rugby Union in South Africa. I dearly hope to go again.

I was also really impressed that once the players had left the field they opened the gates up for the children to run riot on the field. A lot of kids were having the time of their lives - sad we can not do the same at Twickenham:




Roll on the Tri-Nations and the World Cup!

Out of Sharms way

Another first visit to a country for me this week – Egypt. On arrival at Cairo airport passport control I was greeted with a rather chaotic mass of people. Some in queues for the foreign exchange and visa stamps. Others in the immigration queue and yet others just milling around looking confused – I was in the latter group. After immigration and showing my passport to at least three other guards in white cotton outfits we had to head across to the domestic terminal. Usually a simple task complicated by the fact that the shuttle bus has been delayed for sometime. So we took a cab then involved a ten minute walk to ride in a taxi for five minutes.

This give me my first experience of Egyptian driving and during those five minutes I observed the following:

1.Dubai driving seems polite in comparison
2.Constant use of the horn is mandatory
3.Wing mirrors are for decoration and a lot of older cars had dispensed with them entirely
4.Reversing up one way streets is standard
5.After honking at a car – if you manage to overtake them, you must then punctuate this by shouting something in Arabic at the slower vehicle
6.Egypt seems to be the place where Fiat's come to die

I look forward to my first trip in a car to Cairo city center – but that will be another time as I headed straight for Sharm El-Sheikh.

Sharm El-Sheikh is most famous for its position next to the Red Sea which provides a sought after destination for divers. The clear, deep and very salty water of the Red Sea provides a great environment for large coral reefs and an abundance of brightly colored marine life.

Like my previous visit to an exotic location (Mauritius) this was for a partner sales conference. It is certainly a far cry from the locations in the UK where I have attended similar events.

The event was held at the Jolie Ville – Movenpick. It is a huge sprawling resort which reminded me of a Butlins type resort but on steroids i.e. Huge main swimming pool, big rooms, more swimming pools and even a man made “Treasure Island Beach”. Seeing this wooden structure on the coast reminded me of the set of the pirate show at the TI casino in Las Vegas:


We made the (long) hike to the Treasure Island Beach and had some fun leaping of the pier into the crystal waters of the Red Sea. My friend Basil made the best leap with a “Back flip, with semi twist and half pike and maximum splash” It was a a good effort and I rated it 9.1/10 – here he is in full flow:



It was eerily quiet on my visit as I guess most of the tourists were staying downtown at Na'aama Bay about five kilometers away. Though there were a smattering of Russian and American tourists which made a nice contrast.

On my final night in Sharm El Shiekh I will ventured to the main drag of Na'ama bay to soak up some of the Apres Beach night life. We had a lot of fun in the Little Buddah bar till late in the night:



A pleasant surprise on the way back to Dubai was being one of the first visitors to Sharm El Sheikh's new airport - which can only be described as an oasis of tranquility compared to the chaos in Cairo airport. I came away with two things from Egypt. One was sun burn and the other a dose of "Delhi Belly" - I will try and be more careful next time.

Spaghetti Interchange

At the moment the RTA are my new best friend. Over the last week interchange five at Dubai Marina as been gradually opening up. Having watched it being built over the last year and also having been stuck in every changing contra-flows and diversions it has now made a fantastic difference to Dubai Marina residents.

Prior to the interchange - in order to get on the Sheikh Zayed road heading to Dubai you had to make fairly bleak choices. First drive through the Marina and then right on to Al Sufouh street, through three sets of lights and then onto the following interchange. This on a traffic free day would take between fifteen and twenty minutes. The other option was to drive in the opposite direction to Ibn Battuta Mall and u-turn there - not ideal but could be fairly quick, say ten to fifteen minutes.

Now with the interchange open - getting on to the Dubai bound Sheik Zayed Road is a revelation. You just filter off to the right and before you know it you are on to seven lanes of highway bliss. This cuts at least ten minutes off my journey but more importantly it is dramatically reducing the traffic in and around the Marina. Which is a good thing as the many thousand JBR apartments are starting to be handed over now and the Marina will see a dramatic influx of new residents over the next six months.

One interesting side effect to the very large interchange opening up - is now the Taxi drivers are totally confused as to which way to go. It now requires constant navigation advice as to which lane, slip road or tunnel they should be aiming at with the end result or numerous less well guided taxis weaving about just before road forks, all looking a little confused. I am sure they will all be up to speed soon.

Here is an impression of the new Interchange 5 from the Gulf News 10/5/2007